Notes from behind the bike shed

Bigger the One

2009-02-03T08:06:00.003+03:00

In keeping with the recent trend of guest posts, please find this latest offering from Marcus Abacus for your reading pleasure...

to us the morning mist, dew, brazen sun
to us the turning sun, morning new,
by turns, times firm or full of flight,
times gaze full of fright,
yet the eye i fear never knew my whispering whimpering nights,
get it for the getting while the getting's good,
the timid reverse courses displayed to all,
to all they are animal rights.

one day the mind gives song,
the song fills pages some, and is presented
to the sure and unsure alike.
i shall read a book and come back despite.

dec 08

People get eaten in zoo's all the time

2008-11-23T19:22:00.001+03:00

The latest words of wisdom from BadArt

Could you please pass the Hommous??!!

2008-10-08T22:05:00.000+03:00

The Lebanese/Israeli conflict has now spread to chickpeas.
In the tradition of taking things that don’t belong to you, the Israelis have been attaching their name to hommous for a while now and the Lebanese aren't having any more of it and rightly so.
Following in the footsteps of only the French having the right to use the word 'Champagne' (including other regions of France that produce sparkling wine), and the European court ruling that 'Feta' belongs to the Greeks and no one else, the Lebanese have a valid argument and should go to court over the national identity of hommous. Funny as this sounds, if the Lebanese do win, the by-product of this disagreement could be an intelligent and non aggressive way, on a global level, of refuting yet another encroachment on the part of their neighbours.
Go Lebanon!

Another Guest Post
BadArt

I like it, I’ll take it …even though I don’t really need it and I cant afford it

2008-09-29T22:18:00.003+03:00

My senses are being assaulted. Every palm tree and lamppost in Bahrain seems to be plastered with advertising boards. Its like a fungus, spreading uncontrollably and sprouting on anything that’s vertical (and in some cases horizontal). The budaiya road should have an epilepsy warning like they do for strobe lighting and video games. Our visual landscape is being polluted by advertising boards and it has gotten completely out of control. They reflect this incessant need from advertisers to shove their ads down our throats and we can’t escape it anywhere. There should be some breathing space for our minds, but none has been left. I do not want to have to be forced to see these ads, I feel like I live inside an advertising agency’s website that I cant click out of. And at the speeds that people travel at on the roads (myself included sometimes) trying to read them endangers myself and the occupants of my car…and for what? BAD ADVERTISING ?!
Which leads me to my next point: if I see another ad for another gated community development whether its on an island or a hill or a golf course (none of which were actually there), I am going to be sick. This bubble of elitist drivel (I live at…don’t let prosperity pass you by…urban living, island style, etc) is presenting us with concepts and images that feed into this aspiration of the lifestyle of the rich and famous, which is frankly tacky, blown out of proportion and deceiving. these ads are so far removed from the reality that I see around me that I simply anm not convinced by them at all. The spin is spinning and I feel sorry for those caught up in the whirlwind. The reality is that the majority of these projects are too vast and so result in poorly conceived urban planning, bursting with poor architecture and feeble lifestyle concepts. The result will be ‘disney’ like environments, superficial and lacking substance.
Not to be too negative and put a downer on the modernisation of these isles, I hope that some will result in pleasurable experiences, but only time will tell. I would only consider moving to one if they completely and absolutely banned all advertising…but there is an ad for a certain donut that’s not too bad…

Guest Post by BadArt

Funny that

2008-07-21T15:10:00.002+03:00

Mention of our little country seems to crop up in the funniest of places, like this article on US government censorship. I actually had the same issue with NASA's SRTM data on the region where Saudi, Qatar and Iran all show up clearly on the tile, but we are nowhere to be seen. It just seems strange to me that they worry about such things when Google Earth shows quite clearly a massive installation in the south of the island that does not appear on any of our official maps.

Sweet Jane

2008-05-15T15:34:00.003+03:00

My 5 year old daughter has a habit of feeding the neighborhood cats which has resulted in more than a few kittens being dropped off in our garden. Of course, once fed, they are practically adopted since you can't get rid of them anyway. Thankfully, nature (and the fact that we live just off a main road) has settled on an attrition rate that means we usually don't have more than a 2-3 at any one point. Her other habit is to give them all girls names.

Enter Jane. The scrawny little ball of black fuzz that greeted me at the door one day expecting my immediate affection and I shuffled past without as much as a glance. I learned later that he had been christened Jane. We had another discussion with my daughter about gender but Jane it was and that was that.

Soon Jane had become somewhat more substantial ball of fuzz and I came home one day to hear my wife lament about his tail. "Did you see it? It's horrible, the poor thing! I'm going to take him to the vet tomorrow morning!" I went out to find him in the corner of the rabbit cage, listless and nursing a bloody lump. It was as if his tail had been skinned and quite disgusting actually.

"I'm afraid we have to amputate", said the vet the minute she saw him. "There's no way to prevent infections so the only choice is to remove it" I received frantic calls from my wife every so often updating me on antibiotics, painkillers and neutering. "Wait a minute, why are we castrating the poor fellow?" I asked. "Well, the vet said that he was such a nice cat and that he would need to be taken indoors to recover from his surgery and that we should just go ahead and adopt him properly and that the only reasonable thing to do in that case would be to neuter him." I know what I was thinking at the time, but to their credit, they did not completely take advantage of the situation.

Two days later, the patient returns home and takes up residence in our kitchen. My complaints about the smell and general hygiene issues were met with drooping eyes and puppydog faces about poor Jane's predicament. At least his name is more appropriate now, I thought to myself. The next 10 days were filled with guests turning their noses (and sometimes stomachs) at the sight of his/her shaved and sutured derrière, chasing said derrière up and down the stairs when he/she escaped the confines of the kitchen, the discovery of random baby gifts ending up in his/her cot (wasn't that the baby's blanket? yeah, but Jane was cold), my mother repeating the word najis endlessly, and my own funny feelings and dreams that I attributed to having a black cat in the house with us.

The final straw was when he decided that his potty was not cutting it and came down to the kitchen to find a massive stain on the floor. Poor Jane had to go out again and that was final. I figured I had done my good deed, shown plenty of tolerance and he/she was only going back to the garden which was not so bad. How wrong I was.

The sad epilogue to this tale (pun intended) happened a few weeks later, when I came home to find the housekeeper saying that Jane was doing something unnatural. "What do you mean unnatural?" She could not answer but soon pointed me in the direction of the garden. I looked out to find Jane sitting underneath another of the garden cats who was happily plowing away at Jane's tail-less behind. I stood there in shock and could not but feel bad for the role we had played in the scene that was playing out before me. Poor Jane...

Ballad sung to the theme of Lou Reed's 'Sweet Jane'

No Comment

2008-05-07T12:36:00.000+03:00

AmericanGoy

What is the velocity of a laden swallow?

2008-04-29T17:29:00.006+03:00

As I was leaving for work this morning, a small bird* swooped down in front of my car and picked up a bright yellow flower from the ground. It then flew up and spiraled around one of the trees in the garden chasing after another bird (possibly female?)

It was a clear and stark sky, the light blue offset by the bright yellow flower and fluttering brown wings, the sun was blazing but it wasn't hot yet, the old trees of our rustic garden indicating a gentle breeze from their slight sway, framing the scene and leaving a very crisp and refreshing image in my mind that I just wanted to share...

* best as I can figure, it was either an Isabelline Wheatear, a Rufus Bushchat or a common house sparrow...

Odds

2008-04-09T12:44:00.004+03:00

I like how it could also be a graphic for a baby in a belly...

from Pixdaus

Song Charts

2008-03-03T17:04:00.005+03:00

Some of these are hit and miss, but others really strike a chord...check out the rest of them on the Flickr Group

Mr. Nice Guy

2008-02-22T18:26:00.004+03:00

Now who does this remind you of?

from PowerLine

hang on a minute...

2008-02-06T09:56:00.000+03:00

A fourth cable has been cut in less than one week? Considering how many ships travel these waterways, the coincidence of all of these anchors being dropped directly on top of an undersea cable severing connections to the world wide web for entire regions (with some of the highest internet penetration rates in the world too) is a bit amazing. You'd think they would mark these things in the age of global positioning systems to avoid exactly this kind of thing. But hey, lighting can strike more than once i suppose...and there go all those Arabs with their silly conspiracy theories again... link

Baby, you know I do...

2007-12-05T08:59:00.000+03:00

I'm not sure much needs be said...this is beyond brilliant...

Thanks to K for infecting me with this...I can't stop singing it...I guess it makes up for times ago buy sos loly...

The greatest weapon ever?

2007-11-24T09:53:00.000+03:00

Hmmm, not so sure about this analysis...I would have like to see a more scientific methodology applied...perhaps a segregation between comics, video games and movies...I can easily think of 5 or 6 off the top of my head that they have missed...Does anyone else notice any glaring omissions?

Ultimate Weapons

calm down folks

2007-11-11T12:47:00.000+03:00

Its just an...

streets paved in gold

2007-11-11T12:38:00.000+03:00

Ever notice that when driving westward around 4ish as the sun is setting?

Batelco bashing

2007-11-10T10:15:00.000+03:00

A necessary rant...

I am a small business user at Yahoo where I host my website and email servers. For the past week, I have been unable to get through to my inbox due to a server error. I have contacted Yahoo 4 times who have assured me (in writing) that there is no problems on their end. My system administrator is at a loss to explain what is going on and Batelco have repeatedly told me that there is no issue with their service and that the problem lays with Yahoo.

My first issue with this is that instead of trying to help a customer, they are passing the buck onto someone else. This just leaves a bad taste in my mouth and does not make me feel like my concerns and issues as a customer are being addressed or even cared about.

My second issue was sparked last night when a friend who also uses Yahoo said he had absolutely no problem accessing his mail. I immediately got on his laptop, typed in the url and sure enough...there was my inbox. I opened messages and even forwarded some mails I needed to gmail so I could do some work. The reason it worked? He was using the MTC Go wireless usb thingy to access the internet instead of Batelco. Therein ensued more feverish testing to see what would and wouldn't work. To sum it all up, MTC works and Batelco doesn't...I don't know why, but I can empirically prove it with a little usb thingy...

Now this raises a whole raft of issues which to be honest, I cannot be coherent about as my blood is boiling. All I can say is that Batelco is completely and utterly useless. They make ridiculous profits year on year, but they cannot provide a simple service in a relatively small and dense location? My ADSL connection at homes drops regularly which is a pain when surfing the net and a much bigger one when it happens as you are downloading something. The solution is to simply install more nodes to carry the service better to the various neighborhoods that are too far away from the central node. Instead, they want to spend 4 billion dollars on international acquisitions.

What about all those customers who have being paying overinflated rates for umpteen years that have gotten you to the position where you can tout such a war chest? Maybe they have recognized that they have already lost their own market and are therefore setting their sights on new pastures? I, for one, say good riddance.

Pots and Kettles

2007-09-28T16:48:00.000+03:00

While everyone continues to speculate about what actually happened in Dayr az-Zawr (I personally believe they were testing out alternative storylines for the new Bond movie), THIS story quietly passed with barely a snort from newsreaders...

Master Chief

2007-09-25T20:13:00.000+03:00

We actually got it yesterday, but I only saw it this morning during a break from work...Graphics are generally better, gameplay and options have definitely been upgraded, weapons are a lot cooler...all in all, a throughly enjoyable romp...

In response to all the media furore

"His Heart Whirs Anew"

2007-08-18T11:47:00.000+03:00

I found this article by Jo el Garreau very interesting...as was the inclusion of Tupac Shakur in the quotes...

preserves...

2007-08-09T10:45:00.001+03:00

so is Nicholas Gurewitch

chickens...

2007-08-09T09:17:00.000+03:00

Doug Savage is great...

Braai-time

2007-08-05T13:36:00.000+03:00

all taped up

2007-08-02T09:18:00.000+03:00

This past week of my life has been dominated entirely by the not-so-smart card.

This whole thing started on Sunday because of an issue with a visa I had applied for, I was required to get a smart card issued to solve the problem. So I left the Immigrations directorate and made an appointment at Central Informatics, arrived on time as was promptly made to wait for an hour. Once my number came up, I got to the desk and was told I needed to get something added to my electricity bill and return, so off to the Municipality I go. I came back to be told that I needed to have all documents for my entire family with me in order to affect the change, so I tried to explain that this was simply not possible since my newborn was only 2 weeks old and because of issues with translation, I still did not have a birth certificate issued, let alone a passport. Never mind that, there was another bigger issue with my Commercial Registration which needed to be resolved. So I was bounced around in the Ministry of Commerce and made to go through a series of paperwork gymnastics to satisfy their various requirements (of course, there where more than one). As of today (one entire working week), I am still waiting for them to clear the note on the system that would allow me to have my smart card issued.

I have not decided whether the system is silly or if it just works a bit too well and will reserve judgment until it actually gets resolved. And what was the change that I wanted to have reflected in my information that caused this entire not-so-merry-go-round, you ask? I wanted to change my address to the current house I am actually living in.

not quite sure of the maths...

2007-07-30T17:33:00.000+03:00

So we have to buy $20 billion worth and they just get $30 billion? [link]

dances with wasps

2007-07-26T19:12:00.000+03:00

An update on my previous post entitled Crouching Fatman Hidden Wasp:

As I sat immobile, nursing my swollen feet, my mind was left to ponder how I was supposed to react to this. Here I am trying to commune with the universe and find some inner peace and along comes this wasp and violently (it really hurt) disrupts my exercise. I mean, sure, I was stepping on his home and blocking him from getting out, but I certainly wasn't being Israeli about it. After all, I pay exorbitantly for the privilege of trampling on that grass. Couldn't he wait until I was done?

The thing is, once you do tai chi outside, it is a totally different experience from practicing inside. It really does feel different (the expression that described the difference best: practicing outside was like eating off fine bone china after having eaten off paper plates). I guess my choice of metaphor kinda explains my waistline.

So, I had to find another place to be outside. But there is something about the proximity of the water, the swaying palms and dancing reeds, and the genteel nature of the Ritz where people elegantly ignore you that gave me little alternative but to go back.

At first, I tried to choose where I practiced carefully, looking for telltale mounds where the wasps had burrowed underground. Then I tried different times of day when I thought they might either be at sleep or out and about taking care of they waspy chores. Eventually, I got so tired of watching the wasps that I gave up and just went out, not caring too much what would happen. And that was when it started to change for me.

The wasps would circle around me so I tried to keep extra still, my feet became lighter on the ground cause I was overly careful about any wasps underneath and I was always watchful of what was happening around me, which took my mind off my form and helped me relax about the movements I was making. All in all, my tai chi improved tremendously and I enjoyed my practice more than ever and I have been given the Native Indian name: dances with wasps

happy ending...

OMG they're gonna shut down facebook!!

2007-07-25T16:49:00.000+03:00

And the real pisser is that they have all your information already...

update: the founder is being sued for fraud and they have lodged an injunction trying to shut down the site until the case is heard. Here is a link from the BBC. Here is another link on how to close down your account.

I guess the histrionic nature of the title had the desired effect, eh?

we don't need no stinkin' grey cells

2007-07-24T09:24:00.000+03:00

Article doesn't say much and speaks volumes at the same time...not that I am an intellectual snob or anything, but how many people have you met that you would like to have subjected to the same test? [link]

You look good when you wear it well

2007-07-22T15:56:00.000+03:00

Driving never ceases to depress me

I saw the new plans for the sitra junction and while they look good on paper (I would have rendered them differently, of course) the sight of huge mountains of sand filling in more of the Tubli Bay and basically connecting Nabih Saleh to land was enough to bring me to tears. Only for a little bit mind you, as I quickly raised the windows and pretended to remove the dust from my eyes.

It was one of my favorite drives in Bahrain, especially during the migratory season when the shallow water was dotted with flamingos sifting through the silt with upsidedown shakes of their beaks. Sure, they were grey and it was stinky, but it was one of the most romantic scenes of island life I could ever describe or imagine.

Soundtrack to all of this: Felixdahousecat's Ready to Wear...for that 80's top of the pops nostaligia

here's a real blast from the past

2007-04-24T08:38:00.000+03:00

Does anyone else remember this? I can't stop singing the theme song...nor can I work out why this was only popular in Bahrain and Brazil?

The Demise of the Gentleman Banker

2007-02-18T07:48:00.000+03:00

Having pretty much been, seen and worn the t-shirt till it fell off in shreds - there ain't much in a Bank I have not done or been around and I have to admit they are fascinating places, today more so than ever. I remember reading an article somewhere on perceived social status and Bankers came out second after Government and Military officials, mostly because of their association with money. Of course, I knew differently then but times have changed. (Note to reader: following paragraphs to be read in a hushed David Attenborough tone)

With our position as the pre-emminant banking centre in the Middle East established, it was not long before a curious creature became a common fixture on the Government Road. They wore rather bland but somehow reassuring grey suits with french cuffs and hermes ties, they wrote long hand-written notes in green ink with impossibly large fountain pens, they were soft but well spoken on a wide variety of subjects, they took an interest in the local culture and customs (more so than the locals) and seemed to genuinely be interested in where they were.

I was lucky enough to catch a few of them, although their numbers were already diminishing by the time I took my first assignment in a Bank. They were keen to teach those who would listen, they tried to instill a sense of morality, ethics and responsibility and they led by example. They had a greater sense of where we were heading, not only as an economy but also as a society and are probably responsible for the development and advancement of many of our most cherished social institutions. After a few years in their company, I left the island for a 10-year hiatus and when I came back, I could not find a single one...

They were replaced by a new breed of Banker who was very focused on his/her position and the status that afforded them. Everyone had french cuffs and svelte suits and talked the good talk. Many aspired to greatness (regardless of whether they were actually worthy of it) and set out to become just that. Unfortunately, there was none of the substance behind the facade that set the Gentleman Banker apart from the rest. The ethics, morality, social responsibility were lost in the rush to get the corner office, the title and the moolah. There was nothing really wrong with the way they conducted their affairs, other than the fact that they were entirely devoid of any sense of style, class and civility. These guys were crude, crass and quite frankly made any business dealing unpalatable. Fortunately for them, the Gentleman Banker was no longer there and they quickly set a new standard, aided by countless minions who all fancied themselves a go at the usury game. Gone were the days when a Mont Blanc pen weighed more than its flash value.

They are not completely extinct however and a few can be sighted when they retreat from their precarious perches, but their days are numbered and not enough are coming up in their place. It is not for them I lament, but for the generations to come. What a waste.

Hands Across Bahrain

2007-02-12T16:11:00.000+03:00

The fearsome Sir Gayax is in town, as some of you have no doubt discovered. His carousing remains true to legend as is his argumentative nature. There were, in between
the wild bouts of drinking and overloud discussions, moments of quiet contemplation that displayed the other side of the beast. This was one of those moments...

- Dude, you guys have a really tiny island

- Yeah

- You could easily get around it in a day. Do you think you could walk it in a day?

- Dunno, sounds tiring (no points for spotting the bahraini)

- You could do it in a relay and break it up into sections.

- Umm, there are a few relay races already and this would be longest one.

- Dude, it's not that long, you could break it into lots of little sections

- Dunno dude, sounds like a lot of coordinartion and effort

- Well, you've got enough people that you could just have them stand next to each other and pass the baton....wait a minute....they don't have to pass anything...they can just stand around and chat or have tea....and we call it...Hands Across Bahrain!

Therein ensues a flurry of calculations to work out how we could do it and raft of ideas of what to do with it. There would be open air concerts, shows and all sorts of activities. You could reach out across the various communities as the chain reaches through the various villages and across towns new and old and out towards the other islands like muharraq, sitra and nabih saleh bringing together all bahraini's in an act of national unity. You could serve refreshments and have tents for women and the elderly and games of the kids.

It could be a great thing...

All those interested in corporate sponsership are invited to contact us via email.

Ended with a Bleat

2006-12-30T09:25:00.000+03:00

Traditionally, Eid is celebrated with the slaughter of a few sheep, but we got a hell of a lot more than we bargained for this year.

Saddam Hussein was executed this morning at 6 am, bringing to an end a life that brought
misery, suffering and death to millions of people. Regardless of how it was this came about, it is justice and probably much more humane than what he did to his own people. I have always held that he should just be left out in Bab El Sharjee and let the people deal with him. I would have given him about 20-30 seconds before they tore him into shreds. Let's not forget that the traditional send off for Iraqi dictators is to be dragged through the streets for everyone to see.

I am not a violent person by nature, but I remember a book given to me by my Iraqi father-in-law titled "The History of Violent Struggle in Iraq" which begins with the words, "Over five thousand years ago..." which is only to say that this has been going on for a very long time. Saddam's hanging is just the latest chapter in this story. We can only hope that it is nearing the end.

A quick thought for Giacinto Facchetti and James Brown who we also lost this year....

Dude, you're crimping my afro

2006-10-25T09:56:00.000+03:00

How cool is this guy?

I have always said that one of our biggest failings as a people is our inability to make fun of ourselves (and I include myself in that generalisation). While there are a number of exceptions to this sweeping statement (the egyptians for example), this show takes the cake. The humour draws from the mix of different cultures that exists in Iraq and is given substance by the gritty realities of daily life in Iraq, providing a much needed respite from the usual clap-trap. I have not seen an episode yet, but have spoken with a few people who have watched it and am hoping someone will put an episode on YouTube when they get enough bandwidth to upload. I just want to see this guy do his thang.

Check out the article on 'Hurry up, he's Dead'

Global Dimming

2006-08-08T23:09:00.000+03:00

I am getting a bit concerned about pan evapouration rates and the haze around Bahrain.

My Uncle Massimo

2006-07-30T10:41:00.000+03:00

As if the corruption of governments and corporations were not enough...

For too long, sufferring Inter fans have had to live in the ignominy of being almost-rans and runners-up while other clubs have gone from strength to strength. We screamed bloody murder at a long series of bad refereeing, horrible transfers and bum luck while everyone around us snickered. Well, guess who is now above snickering?

With the Moggiopoli scandal now put to bed, we can all calm down and re-visit the events of the past few years...starting with the penalty that was and the penalty that wasn't in the games against Juve in '98 all the way to the infamy of May 5th. But what really grinds my gears is that the juve-scum still have the gall to say that they had won the scudetto on the pitch...Sure you did, you and the referee's and the FIGC and the rest of your corrupt cabal...if you want to call that winning, when in fact it is called cheating...How people can be so obtuse in the face of insurmountable evidence is just further evidence of the insanity of the situation...and now, everyone from nedved to blasi are saying that thje title should not have been given to Inter...well, who should it go to? Shall we just leave it unawarded - WTF are we playing for here, anyway? For God's sake, what are we teaching our children?

Not to award the scudetto from last season to Inter would imply that all of serie A was corrupt and therefore no one is worthy of the title, which is simply not true. Why should everyone who was honest be punished for the actions of the dishonest? If this is the case, then there is no reason to watch italian football at all. They need clubs like Inter to prove that not everyone is a cheating, lying thug and to bring the sport back to basics. The top placed team that played by the rules should be awarded the scudetto, end of story, moot point, fait acompli, What-Ever

The Inter website only has a single post composed of a few lines that they were awarded the scudetto and a picture of Massimo Moratti, the smile on his face nowhere near what I have seen after a win. When Burlesconi - a totally reprehensible mand - says that the scudetto was no more than a lifetime achievment award for Moratti, I say that there is no one more deserving. This man has pumped over $500 million of his own money into the club and sufferred as a true fan only to discover that people were cheating all along? And then to have the grace not to get involved in the ensuing shit slinging when you have the biggest bucket? That, for me, defines class.

As an Inter fan, I am extremely happy about the scudetto but extremely sad about the circumstances under which it was awarded. I still feel that we have been robbed of other titles, but I take my lead from uncle massimo. Anyway, it would be too disruptive to dig up the past when we should be looking to the future. Either way, I feel that we deserved the title and am very much looking to the new jersey with the scudetto and the cup.

Io Sono Interisti

Crouching Fatman, Hidden Wasp

2006-07-29T12:17:00.000+03:00

It's the weekend and my family are away, so I pottered down to the 'gym' for my fatman's workout (a little posturing on the beach, then hit the hammam for an hour). I get there around 8 am, find a nice spot under the palm trees and settle into my routine.

It was a lovely morning with a cooling breeze coming in off the water and the incoming tide providing a visual backdrop to time my tai chi to - fantastic. About halfway through (as I was coming into brush knee twist step) I stepped out and felt a piercing pain in one of my toes. I fell down immediately (pain, movement, balance and what-not) grabbing my toes and looking for what I stepped on. There was a little pinprick of blood on my toe and I didn't understand how such a small wound could hurt so much until I saw a black wasp lying on the grass a few feet away. It was on its back, obviously damaged, but its stinger was still vigorously pumping in and out of its bottom. It was staring at me.

I sat there, gripping my toe and stared back at my assailant for what seemed like a few minutes until I heard a buzzing noise. I jumped up to find another wasp flying out from underneath me at which point I decided to give up on the nice grassy knoll since it seemed to be inhabited by burrowing wasps and went for a swim in the sea. The saltwater did the trick and I went about the rest of my day.

Until this morning when I woke up, swung myself over the side of the bed and plopped my feet down. The soles of both my feet are swollen and itchy. I am fine, but cannot wear shoes or socks and have to scratch my feet every few minutes.

I am not sure how I feel about my efforts to commune with my surrounding environment resulting in getting attacked, but then again, I suppose I did step on his house. I therefore decided to absolve the wasp for his role and place the blame on squarely on the Ritz - who in typical American imperialist fashion, decided to replace the grass on the lawns to fit with their own franchised look, and which -duhhh- does not work here. Hmmm, there are a few parallels here to pick on....

Anyone who has an idea on what this insect was and what I can do about my feet, please help...

Maa'dan

2006-06-16T09:26:00.000+03:00

I lived a sheltered life as a child and grew into a young adult that could tow the party line with the best of them. And when faced with the realities of this world, I went underground...but then I came back...and the truth was just too overwhelmingly omnipresent for me to ignore.

Never mind that the Bahrain I grew up in as a child has very little to do with the Bahrain that I currently live in. It is the value systems that I just cannot fathom.

They will not buy anything unless it is discounted, or feel that they are getting some sort of a bargin. Reminds me of that joke: why are all bahraini men circumcised? because bahraini women will only take something if it has 25% off.

The first reaction to anything they see is, I can do that! Without any regard for the skill or thought that went into making something or for the final outcome which is invariably some frankenstien version of the original that has none of the funtionality, but hey, it only cost half the price.

Finally, and this really gets my goat, the nicer one is with them, the more they think that you are stupid and try to take advantage of you. And when confronted with the facts, they make up some bullshit story that is obviously an excersie in face-saving that is just not going to fly, but it does not stop them from trying...

It just seems to me like there is something missing in the fundament, Maa'den in Arabic, or is it firmament? Dunno...just very frustrated with things right now...

Has anyone else seen this?

2006-05-12T23:04:00.000+03:00

Browsing through the on-board entertainment menu on a flight back from Dubai, I settled on Morgan Spurlock's new show '30 Days' in which he and his girlfriend try to live at the minimum wage for said time period. Anyway,

Halfway through, while I was helping my 3 year old daughter with some colouring, Morgan was interviewing an older Hispanic gentlemen in a hospital who was wearing a black t-shirt and written on it in white arabic script was the word 'Al Bahrain'.

I have not been able to get to see the documentary since and wanted to know if anyone else can confirm my casual glance

just out of curiosity

USURY-R-US

2006-05-11T18:47:00.001+03:00

A professor once asked me to submit a paper I had written for his Business Ethics class on Islamic Banking to a magazine he co-edited. I was obviously flattered and promised to have another look at it and get back to him but never did submit it finally. Certain reservations I was never able to rationalise left me uncomfortable with the article.

Let me start out by saying that the class was part of the mandatory curriculum in the first year and I chose the topic because it presented a strong fit with the parameters of the assignment. I have neither the religious nor historical knowledge of the details to present a definitive view, but I had read a significant amount on the subject (whatever was available then) and the basic religious principles were quite simple really.

Fundamental to the whole issue is the underlying risk of the transaction. As long as there was some exchange of tangible assets / goods / commodities then you could finance the transaction Islamically and the more market risk you were exposed to, the better. What is not acceptable is a 'done deal' or a back to back paper transaction, i.e., if there was no risk in the transaction or if you were covering your risks through forward sales and just taking your cut, then you ain't kosher (ptp). But what were all these banks to do with the money if they could not place it in short term deposits that would earn interest and provide liquidity when needed.

Early on, I found out that there was a very broad scope of interpretation for what you can and cannot do. Not that people were unscrupulous necessarily, but exhibited varying degrees of pragmatism, reasoning and rationalising. I remember discussing this with an uncle who is both religious and into metal trading who basically turned down a massive contract with one of the banks exactly for that reason. They wanted to park their money in forward contracts on the metal exchange where guess what the rate of return was on the forward sale? Very close to the Interbank Offered Rate, i.e. the rate of interest they would have gotten at a bank.

My issue was not with Islamic banking per se, but the rest of the international financial systems. Ultimately, all money will eventually return to the system because there is no other place for it to go, and somewhere, someone will earn interest off it. And most of the commodities being traded were part of the same system. What was required was to create another system that could provide a short term place to park funds that banks could use to earn some cash off their deposits, but stay within the confines of Islamic jurisprudence. There was an attempt to establish a company whose shares were traded and for which there was a market maker at all time providing liquidity, but the actual company's performance was never that good. What was really required was a basic commodity which was subject to market fluctuations which was in plentiful supply locally and for which there was an enormous demand for…hmmm…let me think here…I think we might have something like that over here, but then again, it isn't really our oil anyway is it.

Enter the era of massive real estate projects. I do agree that private equity is probably the most Islamic of all forms of banking, but not the way it is practiced over here. It is too easy for banks to take their money upfront and leave the investors with dud participations that have already had all the cream taken out. Yes the investor is left with a fundamentally Islamic investment, but the bank that sold it to him has already taken its profits and is sitting pretty while the investor has to sweat.

From my perspective, I am left with the same uneasiness as I did when the question of business ethics was first raised and still have no obvious answer. Otherwise, Islamic Banking to me holds the same appeal as credit cards from your favourite football team.

The Season of Mists

2006-01-19T12:13:00.000+03:00

The weather has finally cooled down enough to illicit a few shivers...or is it more than just that...

Driving back home late a few nights ago, I lost myself in the delicate wispy tendrils of mist that crept onto the edges of the highway. Around this time of year, the damp in the ground (Bahrain is, for the most part, just a few meters above sea-level) rises and the little droplets of moisture form a dense layer of fog which hangs a few meters above the ground. The Fog can basically appear anywhere and with little or no notice; one minute you are driving along with clear views and the next minute, you are driving through a cloud and can barely see more than the front of your hood.

Aside from living in a hot country where clouds in the sky are a rare occurance, there is something else that is exciting and slightly scary about the mist. Aside from the novelty value, there is something about the way the damp gets under your skin and into your bones and just sits there, making sure that you know something is different.

Now the strongest concentration of mist is typically in the areas that are not yet built up where the moisture can easily rise to the surface. One such place is the the highway to Saudi which has large tracts of land on either side in the final stretch before the bridge, which brings us to my story...

Driving home late one night, I sped under the fly-over and emerged from the other side underneath a thick blanket of mist. It hung about 4-5 meters above the ground, well over my head, and was so well lit by the street lamps overhead that the fog seemed luminescent. And as I looked above me, the structures formed by the fog within the confines of the corridor of the highway reminded me of the interior structures of a Gaudi building; that is to say, I felt like I was in the belly of some organic beast that had swallowed me whole. And as I gazed up at the rib-like tendrils of mist that formed this perfect compartment, I realised that was scared but could not tell you off what. And then, quicker than it had appeared, the mist lifted and I was on the exit heading home...

Location, location, location; I guess you had to be there to understand...

I love the smell of cordite in the morning

2005-08-03T16:06:00.000+03:00

I spent about two months in Baghdad at the beginning of last year. Things were not that bad yet (everything is relative in a war-zone) and it was a very interesting time for me. The following are bits and pieces of things that I saw and wrote down, in no particular order. Looking back a year and a half later, I am shocked by how things have degenerated, but then again, maybe not. Anyway, I guess this is another attempt to spice up this otherwise boring blog, anyway, here it goes:

Night falls over Baghdad. The outlines of the city blur where there is no electricity and sharply comes back where there is, the sounds of nearby gunfire and distant explosions, flashes of lights followed by loud cracks, the faint hum of the transport planes high above, the screeching of the jets cutting through the sky, and the loud chopping sounds of the apaches, so close overhead but still invisible against the dark night sky. All this mixed in with the inelegant drone of thousands of generators and the barking of Bahgdad’s rather large population of wild dogs (who are obviously better informed on impending explosions, but rather poor at navigating the roads).

The many carts that fill the roads, carrying fish, vegetables and produce, and scrap metal. Basically a 1 meter x 1 meter square with raised edges, 3 wheels and a large handle that comes up from the corners of the box to about chest hight. The bottom is covered with a plastic tarp which keeps the water in and the fish (somewhat) alive. They gasp and wriggle as they are ferryed around town, waiting to become dinner. I saw a group of GI’s call over a small lad selling fish while waiting for the driver one day. Such a foreign concept for them, all they could muster were jokes about the fish calling for bob and asking the boy would the fish give one of them a blowjob.

The piles of new washing machines, refrigerators, air conditioning units and other multitudes of white goods sitting outside store fronts and the rapid rate at which they were moving. I shared a seat on the plane next to one of the CPA people in charge of Power. I asked when we could expect power to stabalise and her answer was that they were already back to pre-war capacity, but had not anticipated that the open market would result in such an increase in demand for power (from all the new units being sold above).

The brand new signage on the streets, huge clean billboards advertising everything from consumer electronics to cigarettes, sitting atop old, beaten up buildings with massive holes in them.

The beautiful buildings on the old streets of baghdad, the churches, and statues. The mark left by the british is still evident in the architecture around baghdad. Sometimes driving past Abu Nuwas or Al Rasheed streets you catch glimpses of old balconies overlooking tight dusty streets criss-crossed with washing lines and you are transported back 100 years in an instant. I always look, expecting Freya Stark to walk out of one of those doors just at the moment I drive by.

The sight of a massive hoard of bedouins coming into the palestine hotel, all with brush-like beards ranging in colour from deep black to henna red to wiry white and all shades in between, all wearing their bishoot , casually tucked under their arms, over dark thobes and black and white keffiyah with sloping iqaals, all with the sand-beaten faces, their desert noses sniffing suspiciously at the smells of the city.

Weary Americans, serious Americans, condescending Americans, scared Americans, confused Americans, loud Americans, gesteculating Americans, always armed Americans, sometimes twitching Americans, aloof Americans, pleasant Americans, distant Americans...

Stories…so many stories of torture, theft, of abuse, of good and bad timing, mostly of money lost. You could not move 20 meters in Baghdad without hearing one. And they are so sad you can only survive them by forgetting as soon as you heard. Interestingly, they didn't really care if you listened. Just having an audience that nodded and mouthed platitudes was more than enough for their catharsis.

Napoli pizza shop and the Barcelona Kebab Shop. Next to our office in Karadat Mariam, there are quite a few places to eat. The one that grabbed my imagination immediately was the Napoli pizza shop which had a huge Italian flag hanging outside their store. The two guys that run it used to live in Kuwait and so we traded a few stories and made friends. They are very popular with the foreigners and the americans have given them an MCI (cell phone-very difficult to get) just to take orders for them. The Barcelona Kebab Shop is just down the road from Napoli Pizza, but I don’t know what it is called. All the guys working there wear Barca jerseys (fake ones they made themselves – now those are fans!). They play regular games each night in the park not far from the Green Zone and I went by one night to watch. The striker is actually very good. We talk football whenever I walk by or go in for a bite and they love it. Edgar Davids was the hot topic of the moment as well as the best role for Ronaldinho, Saviola and Quaresma (as wingers, playing just behind Kluivert, or instead of him) and so on. This was a year ago, of course, but how they must have celebrated when the blaugrana won the league a few months back...

Falling phones. Satallite phones are very tempermental things. You have to be outside, facing the right direction on a clear, cloudless day in order to actually get any reception, and even then, you might not. As we are working inside offices most of the time, they are almost entirely useless. At our offices, I have found a window that gets some reception as it faces the right direction, but have to open window in order to actually get or make a call. On a day when I was expecting a call, I had left the window open and the phone perched on the ledge. A few hours later, I thought to make a call since I had not yet received one. I found the window shut and the phone nowhere to be seen. Realising it had been windy that day, I immediately ran down to the street and looked underneath the window, but no phone. Not even the shards of plastic one would have expected from a broken cover. I asked people standing around, but no one had seen a thing. I was not about search people so I assumed the worst and turned to go back up when someone walked up to me from across the street and asked if I had lost something. I said yes, my Thuraya had falled from the window and seems to have disappeared. He put his hand in his pocket and withdrew my phone, “Is this the one?” I could not believe my luck. He had seen the phone, picked it up and waited for someone to some looking for it. I thanked him profusely and took out a bill from my pocket which was a $50 note (about 2-3 months salary). He looked at me as if I had insulted him and absolutely refused to accept it. After a long exchange of pleasantries and much insistance, he finally agreed to have lunch with me and make a donation of $ 50 on my behalf at the mosque of his choice.

Well, I think that is enough for one post...tune in next time when we cover

Driving in Baghdad - Wooo-hoo! Get suited, booted an’ ride ‘em, cowboy!
Food - You haven’t been to Baghdad until you’ve had masgoof

Keep your palms, we have a pearl

2005-06-22T17:43:00.000+03:00

I wrote this a couple of years ago and was reminded of it recently by a friend, so I decided to post it in a effort to make up for my lack of blogging and to make up for my otherwise boring econo-blogs.

A friend of mine asked me to describe Bahrain in 200 years time, as a sort of exercise in imagination. The first thing that came to my mind as I drove back that night, was of superconductor highways that crisscrossed over the land and electromagnetically charged vehicles floating along, their speed and course regulated by sophisticated circuitry. The idea had instant appeal, especially as I was cruising along watching complete idiots driving with absolutely no regard for their own or anyone else's lives. My mind was filled with images of fabulous sedans without wheels that hovered down to pick up passengers and then gently and silently rose up and sped away, their on-board computers in complete control of its course and trajectory. ‘Traffic’ computers would control the system and regulate the flow to prevent any form of accidents happening or any horsing around. It was promising. A bit too rigid, but a transportation system was only a beginning anyway.

I began to think on a larger scale and was soon brought to that supreme example of terra-forming, the Palm Islands of the coast of Dubai. Easily visible from space (not saying much though, cause so are the numbers on your credit card), it nonetheless ‘brands’ itself in a copyright-like circle as the land of the Palms (notwithstanding the fact that others might have a greater claim to that title). ** (Keep in mind I wrote this well over two years ago and we now have many similar examples of terraforming in Bahrain.)

However, landfilling and reclamation seems too physical intrusive and extremely damaging to the environment for my taste, but there was a limited amount of land available in Bahrain and with 200 years of population growth, it simply wasn’t enough.

So it had to be out at sea. And I love the sea. So here is my pitch: Build platforms onto the sea rather than bury it away. Keep the marine environment underneath you as it provides a source of food, income and much more. And you can shape them any way you want! My image was of Bahrain as un upside down teardrop, with arches that reached out from Budaiya and Muharraq to create a semi circle that met to create the new Bab to Bahrain. The gleaming metal and plastic superstructures would reflect the sun’s rays and shine like a pearl in the sea.

How would it work, you ask?

Advancing undersea drilling techniques used in building oil rigs to create a stable platform that multi-story structures can be built upon. The basic construction material used in filling out the aluminium (we’ve got tons of it) skeleton would be super toughened see-through plastic resin sheets (I figure with the world’s leading producer of petrochemicals and plastics next door, they’ll come up with this in 200 years time, easy). The overall effect would be of a large collection of shiny boxes built up. The lower levels would be clear and allow the sun light through to heat seawater collected in massive solar powered distillation tanks that could provide clean drinking water as well as using the steam to power turbines that can generate electricity. As one got higher into the heavy traffic areas, the resin sheets would be tinted darker and in a range of colors. This would enable both privacy and personal expression (with photoelectric cells, it could be done at the flick of a switch). Then you’ve got the fish farms to cultivate food and biomass, underwater turbines to generate electricity, and super-sophisticated waste processing plants. We could go on and on and on…..

Unfortunately, the Gulf is too shallow and warm, otherwise, we could really push the boat out and try to tap into cold deep sea currents for energy, horticulture and air-conditioning.

With all due credit to David Wingrove and John Pina Craven (whose ideas this is all based on)

Commentary

2005-06-20T17:53:00.000+03:00

I was going to title this post, “It works!”, but I have so busy that my untimely replies do not constitute an effective system of communication as the title might imply. I am nonetheless pleased with getting some comments, especially as they lead me rather nicely into this post.

I will reply to the comments in reverse order, beginning with Chan’ad. The point being made was that it would be difficult to encourage businessmen to part with their money, which I agree with entirely. It would be an interesting exercise to actually conduct a study to measure the actual number of times that an increase in disposable income would circulate in the economy and who would benefit most from that increase in spending. Unfortunately, I have a day job and unless there are a bunch of over-eager students out there, it will have to remain an academic debate, without statistics to back it up.

My argument is that the same businessmen who sit on the boards of the major companies are the ones who also have substantial interests in retail and service industries. Whereas I agree that there will be some spillage as you transfer from one pocket to the other and that the average businessman might not feel the effect directly, the overall effect on the economy is undeniable. Moreover, there is a feel-good factor here in making your staff more comfortable and loyal to your firm that I am interested in, which I plan to expound upon in my next post entitled the Profit Motive.

Ultimately, the market itself will correct price imperfections, as employees will migrate to the jobs that pay them better. The national interest argument is not a namby pamby one, as I believe the character of our workforce and their application to their jobs is perhaps the most important issue facing our economy today. After all, what are the labour market reforms but an attempt to correct what is percieved as an unwillingness to work hard (well, part of their point, albeit not all of it).

Onto the first comment from Bahrania which I believe provides the basis of the argument for labour market reforms. First off, thanks on the slippery economic eel nudge, I do not deny it in the least.

In defense of the EDB, they have actually announced sweeping reforms, of which the labour market represents only one third. Furthermore, they have recently engaged SOM to prepare a master plan for Bahrain, which is also much needed and another step in the right direction. We do not have a Ministry for Planning in the Kingdom and the EDB is actually trying to fill that role. The true measure of their success will only become apparent much later down the line.

With regard to SME’s, you have made the blanket statement that they represent the ‘main engine of growth and the largest source of employment’ which is simply not true in an economy such as ours. In fact the Government is the largest employer and SME’s are hardly playing the role of driver of economic growth (though it is difficult to assess what percentage of the economy SME’s actually represent – have just had a look at Bahrain’s GDP figures and feel comfortable saying that SME’s would not consitute a large proportion only because the sectors they are most present in are small components of the GDP caculation).

SME’s are the grass-roots of an economy and represent the basic goods and services and are typically owned and run by locals. The vast majority of the labour that SME’s currently use are expats which means that they can offer their services at a low rate. It is this low rate that, in many ways, sustains our economy, and maintains a low cost of living.

The introduction of the labour market reforms should, in fact, make the provision of such services more expensive. The hope here being that as more locals will see the potential to make greater returns from entrepreneurial activities, and more small and medium sized businesses will actually grow to fulfill the role you anticipated for them. Of course, it will come at a cost to the economy as a whole; a much higher rate of inflation and an increase in the cost of living. And if you thought getting a few businessmen to part with their cash was difficult, try explainning to the average joe why he has to pay more for things.

I do not believe this to be a bad thing, as long as there is a recognition of the need for greater regulations, stricter controls and standards, and better training. All of which should raise the level of the goods and services offered in the economy and therefore improve the standard of living in Bahrain.

Not quite sure what your final comment meant, but I would end by saying that we are living in interesting times and decisions we take today will have much more meaningful ramifications for how we live than the cost of getting a dress made or a car fixed. And this goes back to the issue of character, which I keep harping on about.

I am currently reading the Corrosion of Character by Richard Sennet and recommend it highly to anyone in business.

Laffer, Lorenz and Pareto

2005-04-26T11:33:00.000+03:00

As there has been little interest in directing the topic of this post, I am shying away from expounding on my personal manifesto for the economics of the region. What I would like to do is draw reference from the work of some more famous economists that I feel has a great deal of relevance to what the real problems are.

The Laffer Curve represents the rate of return from the imposition of taxes and duties and typically looks much like a Bell Curve, i.e. rising upto a point after which it declines and looks much like a bump. The idea behind it is that the imposition of duties will raise funds for the imposing authority, but at the stage that the duties become too high, then the income generated from them declines until there is no further income because, the assumumption goes, the companies against which the duties will be applied will simply move their business to a more duty-efficient regime. All of this is to say that applying a duty on a particular economic system has to measure the affect that duty will have on certain businesses and at what stage would those businesses move somewhere else.

The Lorenz Curve is a much more interesting for our purposes in that it represents the percentage of the wealth that is held by various segments of society. As is typical of a developing economy with an under-developed middle class, our Lorenz Curve would be heavily weighted towards the top end with a small percentage of the populace controlling the vast majority of the wealth.

This is where it all begins and ends as far as I am concerned. A job for everyone, a car in every driveway, a chicken in every pot. When I began my career as a banker with one of the local instiutions (quite a few moons ago), I was arguing that our salaries were too low in comparison to the rest of the region. And, yes, our bottom line would be affected if we were to increase our overheads. But a quick glance at the shareholding base reveals all the major businessmen on the Island. If they were to put more money in the hands of their staff (aside from making them feel better about the firm they work for) what would these people do with the extra cash? They would most probably be buying more goods and services from the self-same businessmen. The effect is a multiplier which would circulate in the economy and generate even more wealth (and hopefully, flatten the Lorenz Curve out a bit more).

There are two directions that this argument can then take: the issue of wealth distribution and/or the profit motive. Which one is more interesting to you? Have comments, will respond.

Oh, and Pareto was a lovely fella, too.

The One-Armed Economist

2005-03-13T09:05:00.001+03:00

It is practically impossible these days to sit down in a social gathering in Bahrain without hearing some mention of the impending labour market reforms. It is true that waffling is a national pastime in the Middle East, but some people do tend to go on, and on, and on. The final straw for me was when this blog was being used to present a set of ideas that were entirely contradictory to the spirit the blog was (I thought) written.

So, I have decided to set out the arguments FOR the introduction of Labour Market Reforms. No one will argue with the fact that we need to do something before our nation implodes under the weight of economic and social pressure. I, for one, think the suggestions made by McKinsey are not without merit, but feel they fall well short of addressing the underlying issues.

As I write this, I find myself digressing into various little sub-arguments that are important but not directly connected to the matter at hand. Then again, they might be the root of the entire problem. What is happening is that I end up waffling about what I think the issues are (much in the same way as the fellow who irritated me in the first paragraph).

Instead, I will lay out my ideas in a slightly different format and hope to be able to do this by the weekend. In the meantime, I would like to encourage anyone with any interest in the subject to comment on what they feel are the real issues here and how they are best addressed. Just so I don’t feel like I am waffling in the breeze.

I should point out that there is a vast body of information now available on the EDB website that encompasses all of the McKinsey reports to date and would strongly encourage going through them to get a better feel for the work that has been done and the recommendations therein.

Oh, and sorry Harry. I guess they just don’t exist.

Economics of Development in Bahrain

2005-02-19T22:17:00.001+03:00

There is a famous story recounted in business school, an MBA myth maybe, about the consultants who were hired to do an extensive study to come up with a solution to make the commuter trains run on time. After many months of research (and exorbitant fees), they proclaimed they had the answer. They had worked out a solution that would absolutely guarantee that each train would leave its station on schedule and arrive at the next station exactly on time: Don’t open the doors at any of the stations.

There are a number of lessons to be learned from this parable:
1. People will always mess up any system, because that is the nature of humanity
2. It is easy to come up with a solution for a specific problem, but that solution may then create other types of problems
3. The third lesson is about consultants, but is an entirely separate topic of discussion

No doubt the economies of our region are undergoing fundamental and serious issues which must be addressed before they spiral out of control. Despite the false sense of security created by high oil prices and the amount of development in sectors like retail, real estate and industry, there remains an acute awareness that things are not all rosy.

Perhaps the greatest results of the McKinsey Report (though I’m not sure why people call it that as it does not have their logo on it) on labour market reforms in Bahrain are the admission that we are facing a serious unemployment problem that will only compound in the future, and bringing that discussion into the public arena.

I don’t think anyone will particularly argue with this fact, though I have a few reservations about ho they came up with their numbers. For the first time, we are hearing statistics associated with unemployment and comments on Bahraini workers that serve to shock the nation into sitting up and taking notice. By hitting them where it hurts.

While in general agreement, I still felt a twinge whenever my fellow countrymen were referred to as lazy and unproductive, but what about the solution itself? They have proposed the introduction of a levy to increase the cost of cheap foreign labour so as to make them unattractive to local employers when compared with local talent. The idea being to artificially equate between the two so that the Bahraini ends up being more attractive.

Being a student of economic theory, this strikes at the heart of some fundamental issues in economic thought, but which are too boring to recount here. Suffice it to say, we are seriously messing with the system here.

All of this aside, what are the real issues here? Or, what are the issues the reforms do not address?

1. Work Ethic
There is no denying that we have become a dependent nation. There was a letter in the GDN recently, rebuking one of the hotels for limiting their recruitment open day to the morning hours, when the claimant was unable to attend due to his mother being unable to drive him. Now that is what I’m talking about. That is not being lazy, that is a complete lack of understanding that if he wants the job, he has to get up off his ass, find a ride (a friend, a relative, a bus, a taxi, whatever) and go to the bloody interview himself. We cannot expect to be carried around forever and this is the crux of the problem.

2. Inflation
It is inevitable that some (if not all) of the new fees will be passed on to the consumers. This will have knock on effects throughout the economy. By McKinsey’s own estimate, Bahrain will face around 8% inflation once the labour fees are in place. That is a substantial number that can make or break a small economy such as ours.

3. Strategic Direction of the economy
I think it is safe to assume that when the reforms are implemented, certain industries (such as construction) will be hit harder than most, and that many of them will either move offshore or simply shut down. Fine, the UK decided that it did not want to be a manufacturing centre for heavy industries and slowly phased them out, but they had an alternative plan for what industries they wanted to focus on. Do we have such a focus? Have the consultants decided what type of an economy we are going to be? (Holding back the gag-reflex for when the phrase ‘knowledge based economy’ is mentioned).

4. The Training Fund
This is the one that really gets my goat. It is estimated that by 2009, the new reforms will raise about BD 220 million annually. The fund will be presided over by a joint committee comprising Government & Private sector individuals who will determine how the fund will be distributed. I am in no way casting any aspersions over the way the Fund will be managed but I would, however, like to know what the Committee intends to do with the cash. What programmes are going to be introduced to re-train the unemployed? Who will manage them? What systems are going to be introduced to ensure that everyone gets a fair shake? Who will develop and oversee the implementation of the training programmes? Are there any specialist institutions or colleges or teachers that have been mandated to run these programmes?

In my opinion, it is this last point where the entire exercise falls flat on its face. The entire point of this whole exercise is to help unemployed Bahrainis to be reintroduced into the workforce. At present, the intention is to begin looking into that - the training programmes - after six months. Six months ! Between the summer and the year end is simply not enough time to organise an integral part of an economic programme that the future of our economy depends on.

I want to digress a little here to do some general hole poking, in no particular order:
· How would we expect to have more women coming into the workforce (30,000 by the end of the decade) when we will be effectively doubling the cost of domestic workers? We must assume that they are all unmarried or have no children. It is also likely we would lose a similar (if not a larger number) of women currently employed because they will be unable to afford domestic help.
· Ghost workers are, in a sense, a form of private sector social insurance.
· How will we fill all these jobs? There simply are not enough people interested in doing many of the jobs foreign workers do.
· What is the obsession with one-stop-shops anyway?
· I got very worried when the whole process was described as a floating rate that would be, “being managed like a tap which can be turned on and off”

What seems to be absolutely certain, in all of this chit-chat, is that these reforms will be implemented in about 10 months time. And that’s when the pinch will come. A gentle nibble at first, but one that will to grow to affect every aspect of our lives. I started with one so I will end on an ancient parable that comes from these very Islands; change is inevitable.